


How to Deal with a Dangerous Idiotic Lover

by YunaBlaze



Category: Deus Ex (Video Games), Deus Ex: Mankind Divided
Genre: Awkward Flirting, Drama, Established Relationship, Fluff, Humor, M/M, Minor Swearing, Misunderstandings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-21
Updated: 2019-08-21
Packaged: 2020-08-11 18:48:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,387
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20158348
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/YunaBlaze/pseuds/YunaBlaze
Summary: Rule # 1 - Don't aggravate your lover as much as possibleRule # 2 - Try to please them if possibleRule # 3 - If you are pushed to your limit, you are within your rights to yell and push backRule # 4 - Deal with it...





	How to Deal with a Dangerous Idiotic Lover

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Drake](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Drake/gifts).

James “Jim” Miller was tired, exhausted and dead on his feet. Not because of work though. Nope. What was tired him was not stupid missions, hidden conspiracies or even idiotic agents creating drama in TF29. Well... maybe the last one was not wholly true... Seeing his current dilemma did concern one peculiar agent of his and not the infamous troublemaker! Surprisingly. No. The problematic agent in question was Duncan MacReady, head of the Counterterrorism Unit and his boyfriend...

Perhaps argument and fighting might be inevitable between them, seeing that was how they became friend to begin with, countless bickering in the office and then trusting each other’s back on the battlefield. Still, Jim did not want MacReady to become Neil 2.0 and tried to be a better significant other to him than he was with his ex-husband, though his subordinate was making it really rough with his thick-headed stubbornness and my-way-no-highway attitude. It wasn’t like he wanted MacReady to change, though he would appreciate it if his boyfriend would at least try to make things a bit easier for him, seeing his work life was complicated enough with the conspiracies behind every mission and constant dangers in every corner. Was it unreasonable for him to wish for a more peaceful and stable relationship?

Miller sighed as he leaned back against his chair. Just thinking about it was exhausting him...

Just as the Director of the Prague Division was thinking of resting his eyes a bit, his computer beeped, drawing his attention with dread. Unexpectedly, it wasn’t work calling from his higher-ups.

The Australian sighed in slight relief as he looked at the simple greeting on the private messenger. Chang could keep yelling all the conspiracy theories he wanted, but Jim needed something normal in this secret base of theirs to survive, so this chat room app of his was staying.

**BEE-Girl: Hey, EagleEye! How’s the day treating you?**

EagleEye: Tiring. Both my work and boyfriend exhaust me.

**BEE-Girl: Oh boy, what is it this time?**

EagleEye: Pretty much the usual from him. Overwork and bad subordinates

EagleEye: As if I don’t suffer as much as he does

**BEE-Girl: Hmm... Sounds like you two need a vacation.**

**BEE-Girl: When was the last time both of you are out and doing some R&R?**

EagleEye: ...Now that you mention it... We haven’t done any of the sort...

**BEE-Girl: YOU SERIOUS?! NO WONDER YOUR BOYFRIEND IS GRUMPY!**

EagleEye: Well. What are we supposed to do?

EagleEye: I think I have done enough James Bond movies marathon to last a life time here!

**BEE-Girl: Then do something unexpected! A surprise! Hell, I give mine plenty!**

EagleEye: A surprise? Didn’t your surprises landed you in trouble with your boyfriend?

EagleEye: Last I’ve heard, you got cut off with him for what? A year?

**BEE-Girl: THREE MONTH, SIX DAYS AND TWO HOURS!**

**BEE-Girl: Never mind that!**

**BEE-Girl: What’s important is to give something fresh for your new guy.**

**BEE-Girl: A surprise is the best thing!**

EagleEye: Uh-huh

EagleEye: And what do you think is the best surprise for a stubborn idiot?

**BEE-Girl: I DON’T KNOW! FIGURE THAT ONE OUT YOURSELF!**

**BEE-Girl: AS IF I HAVE ENOUGH TIME TO HELP YOU BRAINSTORM!**

**BEE-Girl: I HAVEN’T EVEN HAD TIME TO THINK ABOUT MINE YET!**

Miller sighed as he bid his friend goodbye and close the messenger. Well, he could understand their frustration a bit. From what he gathered, BEE-Girl, was quite a daredevil character, a bit of an adrenaline addict. After all, not many were interested in doing extreme sports for fun. Sadly, their boyfriend seemed to be a bit on the stunned side of things, like what they were doing was fun, but it was not even to get a reaction out of him, so BEE-Girl was unhappy with how bored their boyfriend was with their surprised trips to parachuting, ocean diving, car racing, etc. If Jim didn’t know any better, he would say their boyfriend sounded a lot like Jensen who hardly even twitch in a high profile mission.

When the Director thought about it, dealing MacReady was probably easier than dealing someone like Jensen. At least, when his boyfriend was displeased, he made sure that he and the entire neighbourhood knew it. Jensen? Well... It would be like dealing with a complexed brain teaser puzzle while triggering a bunch of land mines without realizing it. Yeah. He rather dealt with MacReady over someone like Jensen, though he might need to buy some noise-cancelling earbuds. He wasn’t old enough to go deaf so soon.

***

Awkward...

That was all there was in the atmosphere. Thick and heavy atoms known as awkwardness. A poisonous fume that was slowly choking him in a slow and painful manner that reminded him horribly of the Orchid that had once ravaged his body.

Maybe Jim should have known that this was a bad idea...

A military hardhead like Duncan MacReady?

The one thing they all hated was most certainly a supposedly romantic dinner.

Honestly, Miller thought it was a great idea to start with. He and Duncan had been so busy at work that they had been getting nothing but fast food or went to the bar for a quick drink. It would have been an interesting surprise and change of pace to just have a peaceful romantic night together. He had candles and rose petals all around the apartment, even took time to prepare some good steaks for tonight’s dinner, he also brought out a rare vintage he had stashed away, some soft music playing in the background. This was pretty much everything he had never done with anyone else, not even Neil! Yet, MacReady looked like he was ready to flip the table on him for this surprise.

Well, he was definitely scratching romantic dinner off of his list of perfect surprise for a troublesome lover. Maybe he should try mountain climbing next... No, MacReady had never shown much interest in these types of things, preferring a shooting range over outdoor sports. Perhaps a walk through the park or garden? No... That sounded too boring and docile, probably reminding MacReady of his ex’s than anything. A road trip to the country? Nah, it sounded too exhausting and a bit too... country...

‘So... do you want to have sex?’

‘...What?’

Miller was pretty sure his brain had short-circuited or something, because there was no way in Hell and back did he just heard MacReady asked him if he wanted to have sex. Not to mention, his face still looked like he wanted to punch him or murder him on the spot!

‘...Never mind.’

Oh, someone please just put them out of their misery before this awkwardness killed them!

The night ended with them sleeping on the edge of opposite sides of the bed. An obvious dark cloud brewing in between them.

***

A few days later, after drowning glass after glass of wine in his lonesome in bars and at home, the Australian came back to work to find a bit of a mess awaiting him. Ugh... He had screwed up badly. Ever since the supposed romantic dinner, MacReady had apparently been acting... well... acting out. During missions and training sessions, his subordinate had a higher level of viciousness, almost like he was venting his pent-up frustration on unfortunate terrorists and training dummies alike, either aiming at vital parts and shredding them with bullets. A literal crazed gun-wielding murderer on the battlefield. Office days were just as bad, the British agent was like a ticking time-bomb that would go off at least once in a day and he usually ended spreading his destructiveness to have a total of ten victims before he finally stopped.

Now, here they were, locked within the privacy of his office and a stack of disciplinary reports on the desk. Looking at MacReady right now, it almost took him back to the day they met. Same room, same situation, minus the fact that they were a thing. Honestly, it was weird that they had somehow managed to click with one another. After all, Miller was the straight and narrow type of good soldier, while MacReady was the brash and rude type of good soldier. Technically, they never should had been able to mix together and yet... a spark happened, one thing led to another and...

The Director of the Prague Division mentally sighed as he pushed away his personal thoughts on the matter and tried to do his job. He tapped his index finger on the thick stack as he demanded, ‘What do you have to say about this, MacReady?’

‘I don’t know what you are talking about,’ his subordinate replied in his usual condescending tone.

‘Fifty disciplinary reports in five days, MacReady. As in ten reports filed each day,’ Miller said sternly. ‘This is not an acceptable behaviour in TF29, especially when you are responsible for the counter-terrorism unit.’

‘So what? It’s not like the first time I got this. Just tell me already what you want to do about it and let’s be on our way,’ the scarred soldier retorted impatiently.

Miller had to bite the inside of his cheek and dug his nails into his palms to keep himself from throttling his boyfriend for his insubordination. Doing his best to remain calm and focused on the problem at hand. ‘I want to know what is wrong with you these days. Don’t misunderstand, you have always been a cunt, but you have obviously upgraded yourself to bitch.’

Okay... Maybe he was not handling the situation as calmly as he pretended he was. Damn...

‘Wow, thank you so much for your PERSONAL input on the matter, Jim,’ Duncan said sarcastically.

Great... Now MacReady was pulling their private life into this conversation.

‘It is NOT personal. It’s a fact,’ the older man countered, feeling the vein on his temple was slowly pulsing as his own anger was rising as his patience was thinning. ‘Honestly, if ANYONE is getting PERSONAL here, it’s you, Duncan MacReady.’

‘Oh of course, why didn’t I realize I am the PROBLEM here?’ the scarred man muttered in a bored tone. It just grated Miller’s nerves badly, not to mention how his words and tone reminded the Director badly of his ex-husband.

‘YES, YOU ARE!’ Miller snapped back angrily as he slammed his hands on the desk, surprising MacReady a bit. He had actually never lost his temper as badly as he was right now, not even when his boyfriend was being nothing but a pain in the ass. ‘I AM TRYING REALLY HARD TO DEAL WITH YOUR SHIT THESE DAYS! BUT YOU ARE BEING A DAMN BASTARD SINCE OUR LAST DATE! WELL, SORRY FOR TRYING TO GIVE YOU A PLESANT SURPRISE! I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE NICE TO HAVE A ROMANTIC DINNER TOGETHER! I’LL REMEMBER TO NOT TRY SOMETHING REMOTELY NICE WITH YOU NEXT TIME!’

There... He had blown everything he had pent up in his chest for the last few days on the table. Honestly, it was also partially his stress over this relationship of theirs. Maybe a hint of it came from his own self-doubt about being capable to keep a relationship healthy and alive. Not to mention he had to endure MacReady’s temper tantrum for ten days both and his agents’ desperate demands that he did something about the monster in the office, surprisingly that was more urgent to them than the electricity leak in the IT department.

Silence settled between them and the only noises in the room were from the computers’ internal fans and the occasional beep from the server with an update. The Director rubbed his face tiredly, feeling his age more than ever now that he had finished blowing up.

‘I liked it, you know...’

‘...Excuse me?’ Miller murmured tiredly as he pinched the bridge of his nose, doubting MacReady’s words.

Now it was his boyfriend’s turn to sigh as he awkwardly clarified, ‘Look. I... I am really not good with these heart-to-heart talks or being romantic. I know I have botched it up badly that night and I... I’m sorry about that. But... I like it... The surprise romantic dinner... It was... nice.’

‘Then why did you look like you wanted to murder me that night?!’ Miller demanded incredulously.

‘Because I didn’t have anything to give to you! Not to mention you got lots of good stuff on the table that night! It makes me feel bad!’ Duncan retorted angrily, face red in embarrassment.

‘So what? THAT’s why you decided to blurt out about having sex?!’ God... That sounded awfully ridiculous... Like an awkward comedy scene that was made just for jokes.

‘Well, wasn’t THAT what you had in mind?!’ the scarred man questioned in disbelief.

‘SEX was the last thing in my mind when I set up a romantic dinner, Duncan!’ Miller yelled out in embarrassment. Sex was stuck somewhere in the back of his mind, but he wanted to make sure MacReady was relax and enjoying himself first and foremost. So he hadn’t really been expecting any sexual act after dinner and MacReady’s dark look had pretty much shot that idea down. ‘I don’t want things to be just about sex! I want a good relationship between us! I want to be a better boyfriend for you!’

Okay... Maybe he shouldn’t have said that out loud. That sounded too cheesy and probably cringed worthy in MacReady’s tough guy opinion. Ugh... Trying to be a good boyfriend and better partner for your significant other was so difficult...

Great... The dark look had returned...

‘Look, I just-’

Miller was rudely interrupted by his boyfriend who had grabbed his collar and hauled him up and half over the desk, glaring at him as he said, ‘Oh for God’s sake just shut up!’

Without further ado, Duncan smashed their lips against one another. It was rough and messy, but it was nonetheless passionate. Maybe the best way to deal with a danger idiotic boyfriend was simply just let them do as they pleased, because surprise was definitely not a good idea.

Now that Miller thought about it, he pitied BEE-Girl’s boyfriend, seeing he probably had to deal with their constant surprises. Poor guy... He probably suffered a lot more than he did...

***

Outside of the office, an agent sneezed into his bowl of cereals.


End file.
